


Livin It Up

by OhTheatre



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alcohol, M/M, Multi, Partying, read warnings please!!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-10
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:08:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23094586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OhTheatre/pseuds/OhTheatre
Summary: Roman throws yet another party, and his only true hope for the night is someone to show up. Patton finds himself disturbed, and Logan needs to stop drinking.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Logicality, Moceit, Morality | Patton Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Prinxiety, demus - Relationship
Comments: 22
Kudos: 70





	1. An Abrupt Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> More info about the characters and story on my tumblr under #livin it up au
> 
> a/n: Me starting another story i hate? yeah! Me? Hating every single thing I write?? BUT OFC GOD I HATE THIS SO MUCH IT SUCKS AHAHA. Im so frustrated, I couldnt get Logans end rant to work and its stupid and I just hate everything i hate this i hate my writing hnnng
> 
> TW: Swearing, alcohol, underage drinking, drinking, parties, kissing, throw up

“Thank you, for coming to this party with me” Virgil repeats once more, combing through his hair for the fifteenth time. Patton chuckles from his bed, neatly sitting as he flips through his book, writing down notes in his book. “Have I mentioned thank you?” Virgil jokes, Patton nods, biting his lip as he crosses through a difficult section.

“The golgi apparatus provides transportation-”

“Pat! Shouldn't you be getting ready?” Virgil turns to him, the cheerleader stops chewing the end of his pencil, a sweet smile as he shrugs. He closes his books, stacking them neatly on his shelf, everything organized. Once his homework is tucked away into the right folders and his pencils are safely back in his pencil case he moves to the mirror.

“I'm good to go” He says flopping back to his bed, Virgil scoffs. “Virge, these parties aren't anything formal. As long as you've got your phone, clothes and a swimsuit you're good” Patton assures, Virgil nods sitting on the bed, his shoes lacing as he hums. Patton adds his final bow, putting his boots comfortably on. “Ready?” He questions, Virgil sighs patting his jeans.

“I guess”

~~~

“Hey sorry Cindy you mind if i borrow Logan?” Roman taps on the girls shoulder, she sighs pulling away from Logan's mouth. He waves her off grumpily following Roman into the kitchen. “What's that? Third one tonight?” Roman teases, setting up the snacks

“Fourth” He corrects picking his teeth. “Carter, Fiona, Marty and Cindy” He sits on the stool, stirring his drink, the remaining ice clinking delicately. Roman wants to push but fears a drunken argument before his gathering so allows Logan to pour himself more of whatever murky drink he had been guzzling down. “Mm, why must we have these soirees” Logan mumbles, spinning around.

“Its a party Logan, i've been attending and hosting them for ages!” Roman argues, he sighs finally finishing his set up. “Look just dont make out with too many people, I don't need a million girls crying at me at the end of the night because they thought you were the one”

“They know im gay right?” He sips, adjusting his glasses.

“Do _you_ know youre gay?” Roman retorts, a glare is his gift in return. “Why do you do it then?” Roman inquires, moving the pair through the already bustling house.

“Its fun” Logan shrugs, Roman pauses snickering as he carries the chips. “Not fun, but its something to do. Mind numbing and does not require actual intellect” Logan slumps on the couch almost instantly finding himself lip to lip with yet another poor and emotional victim. Roman rolls his eyes walking away from the mess. The door continues to open as more people file in, soon the familiar scent of alcohol and booze fill the air and Roman finds himself taking the tiniest sips from his own drink. With every creak of the door, the slightest hope lights up the man.

_Come on_

_Just walk through the door_

_Please_

~~~

“Do I drink, do I get a drink, what do I do? I got this” Virgil rambles, Patton chuckles, shaking his head. Closing the door behind him he guides Virgil into the kitchen, serving him a club soda. He takes it, almost finishing the entire thing, the sweat dripping his anxiousness for miles. “Thanks, ugh why am i here”

“Because I invited you” Roman chimes in, Virgil practically chokes back his drink, being rescued by Patton. “I'm really glad you're here Virge” Roman smirks, Virgil nods through his ever increasing reddened face. His eyes land on Patton, a slight regret but a neutral respect is shared with a nod.

“Ill be by the pool if you need me” Patton whispers, taking his leave, into the rioting house.

“How are you?” Virgil decides, Roman closes the door behind them chuckling as he closes the distance. “That's not an answer” His nerves seem to calm as his ‘radiant’ sarcasm takes place. Somehow his annoyance for Roman returned, his defenses lifted. “Nice house, mind giving me a tour?” He dances out from the ever closing gap Roman entraps him in, a slight scoff of amusement but the teen obliges.

“Well this is the kitchen, an original model and renovated around 5 years ago” Roman demonstrates, Virgil nods finding it actually quite interesting. A serenity falling over him as he takes this moment to breathe. “Over here is the hallway, leading into an assortment of rooms” He explains, Virgil identifies a name plastered on each. “You've got the bathroom, an office and our library still in its original condition from 1875” He hopes to impress the young teen. Knowing Logan, when he was still fresh, found the room the most enchanting thing.

“And where's your room?” Virgil teases, knowing this apartment was enormous in its own right.

“Upstairs” Roman replies, Virgil bites his tongue. Upstairs, god this apartment was huge. “And downstairs we have the pool and some storage. Nobody really uses the pool to be honest. Mostly people seem to hang out in the living room or-”

“The other living room?” Virgil points as they come into yet another opening, flashing lights, loud screeches and many drunken dancers. Roman and him share an amused laugh.

“Care for a dance?” Roman nudges, Virgil scoffs, taking yet another sip of his drink. Finding the teen to be serious he can't help but allow this to fuel his laughter more.

“Me? Dance? Oh that's not the issue...it's dancing with you..” Virgil carries on, Roman rolls his eyes dragging him onto the floor. Slow but upbeat movements take place and...what's this? Is Virgil having...fun?

~~~

The light splashes and ripples of waves as Patton let his feet dangle felt calming. No part of him missed the chaos upstairs, sure freshman year this kind of thing was at least slightly intriguing. But the parties and the drinking grew tiresome and well...annoying. At least now he knew his way around, no one went near the pool, it restricted them.

So, with his bubbling soda by his side, and his book in hand he just sat. It was almost peaceful, the moon found its way through the window, the muffled sounds of music were present and the water felt cool to the touch, reminding him he was there.

“Are you reading?” A slurred voice requests, Patton squints up watching Logan tumble into the space. His feet repeating a crass and heavy movement.

“Are you tap dancing?” Patton hides his giggle. Logan shrugs dropping what seems to be his hundredth red solo cup of the night. Roman makes it a point to never give him glass ones or anything fancier seeing as his tendency to well...destroy grows heavy.

“Trying to” he continues, practically falling over himself, the pool and him soon to become very familiar. “Why are you reading at a party, it's a party or a social gathering and while reading is generally an enjoyable activity it deems itself unsocial and a bore when surrounded by peers and other things to spark your brain” He rambles, Patton forgot how fast the teen could talk. Logan had not been to debate in awhile. “Captain of the cheerleading squad, I would presume this is exactly your type of event” Logan staggers forward a bit more.

“Observant” Patton mumbles, returning his focus to his book, flipping through the pages happily.

“I mean I did happen to notice some of your team was present” Logan continues, Patton nods.

“Yes, I saw you and Brianna grow very close, I think a spring wedding” Patton jokes, Logan furrows his brows clearly scanning his already jumbled brain for the person in question. “Red head, wearing the green sweater and jeans” Patton reminds, Logan snaps a flash of excitement.

“Ah yes! She was fun, well okay, better than most people I suppose.” He sighs, finally finding himself a ground, he breathes. “I want to swim, so with my capable body and sane mind I shall” He deems, Patton looks up catching Logan as he removes his shirt. Now Patton wasn't invisible and he wasn't one to deny that Logan was well...fit. Hearing the splash as Logan falls into the pool he returns to his book. The water makes a plethora of noises, moving around the pool growing close to Patton. “You're intelligent” Logan pops up, Patton's gaze moves to him. He's closer now, fiddling with the water around him.

“Thank you?” Patton wonders, its random but he thinks its a compliment.

“Straight A’s, you skipped your junior year” Logan lists, Patton knows all this but he hums along, no harm in listening. “Captain of the cheerleading squad, student council president and vice president to the drama cabinet” Logan moves closer, Patton finally understands.

“So this is how you do it?” Patton kicks a tiny bit, the water flicks melting back into the pool. “You root out their accomplishments, find yourself impressed and then suddenly head over heels for you” He laughs, Logan hates the weird sense that floods him as the delicate sound sweeps the room.

“Photographic memory” Logan shrugs, leaning back as his hair washes over, drooping with thick water. He advances, curious as Patton continues to neglect him and read his book. “Im not wrong am i?” Patton shrugs, his eyes averting Logans prominent gaze. “Why dont you get in the pool? Why come down to read and sit with your feet in the water when your body could be submerged, are you so bored?” Logan pushes

“Just here for a friend” Pattons short and quick responses bother Logan, something about their manner itches him. He moves closer, finding himself close enough to feel the warmth upon his tingling skin.

“What, may I ask, are you reading?” Logan inquires, peeking over. He attempts to take the book, the world was his to own, why should this book be any different. Patton pulls away and soon the pair commence in a playful game, Patton tugs his book away as Logan fears no boundaries and continues to close the space between them. Grabbing as fast as he can to try and see what might be so much more interesting then Logan himself. Finally it slows and the pair eyes lock, Pattons arms retire and his body relaxes allowing a mutual agreement to both move closer and lock lips with one another.

He couldn't deny that the hype is not valid, he was a good kisser.

But even with Logan's hands meeting his own, and the perfect way this felt…

This wasn't Patton.

He pulls away, resting his hand on Logan's chest. A tender but bittersweet look to a pouting Logan.

“Sorry Moreno, but I'm not going to be one of those girls or boys” He smirks. The shock runs from Logan's face quickly as he pretends to fall hurt back into the pool. Patton stands finding the clock has run its course, and the night comes to a close. Gathering his things, stepping over Logan's mess, with no looking back he makes his way upstairs.

~~~

“Did you atleast have a bit of fun?” Roman hopes, Virgil and him having reconvened in the kitchen.

“When you were not stepping on my feet?” Virgil teases, pouring himself a much needed glass of water. “Yeah I had fun.” He rests, giving a somewhat anxious Roman a reason to breathe. They seemed to keep their proximity to one another, Virgil leans comfortably on the counter.

“Well good…” Roman whispers, not really paying attention as hes much more focused on the small details placed around Virgil's face. The sweet dimple of his sarcastic smirk, the poorly hidden under bags sleeping below his stormy and ebony eyes. The soft yet controlled way he kissed him-

Hold on…

They pull away both utterly confused by how this night had proceeded.

“You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that…” Roman fiddles with Virgil's hand, ignoring the sweat from both.

“Me too” He smiles under his gloom “I think we’re just drunk” Virgil searches for an excuse, he knows the reality. He's been around long enough.

“I'm not drunk, are you?” Romans voice remains soft, Virgil shakes his head. The only drink he had consumed was club soda and water, both becoming aware as they push on his bladder. “I've had a moderate amount of drinks” Roman cant talk apparently, his ability to communicate normally and with his typical charm had clearly left him. Disappointed at his failed attempts.

“I should go” He decides, Patton appearing in the doorway only furthering that choice. Roman pulls away, biting his lip as he nods. “Thanks for inviting me”

“Thanks for coming” He replies, turning to Patton “Both of you” Feeling Virgil slip away, joining Patton. With a timid smile and wave he watches them link arm, rest tired heads and disappear.

~~~

“Are you going to help clean up or sit there and threaten to throw up?” Roman bites, exhausted he organizes and cleans up the remains of his celebration. Logan groans, his head pounding wanting nothing less then to be useless and contain almost zero information.

“He was different, and I don't understand why or how but he was. He was witty and he said no.” Logan begins, Roman yawns knowing what course this was setting him upon. “But I like him and not just I need to win over him but truly like him. I don't like this feeling, but it wasn't a done deal” He speaks, his words making no sense worrying Roman. “I kissed him, kissed him, and I do that. I truly do. I find some brief and fulfilling satisfaction from performing such an action but when he decided against it I felt not..that” Roman nods, processing his vague and ranting words. “Its not that hes cliche and that hes different but it was, he didn't care, this wasnt a game to him or some quick fling or an experimentation it was nothing” He scrambles hard for an explanation, all this thinking hurting his frail state. “I don't know what I feel, I don't understand and I don't enjoy that. I like understanding, I do, I know things, I'm smart, I got it..” This was Romans cue as soon as the self-doubt and irrationality set in, Logan needed to shut down for the evening. “I don't know what I'm talking about, who was it...Patty? Marlene...maybe Connor” he ponders, his trail of thought gone.

“Your fathers coming home tomorrow, we should get you rested and ready for his meeting” Roman reminds, leading a hyper and ranting Logan to his room. He moans as he falls to the bed.

“I loathe the idea of my father returning, I wish not to see him or meet with him. Its the same thing as always, and I don't mind, I've accepted my path but why must I be continued to be reminded of my lack of freedom and set future. I don't care, I have no qualms but to have to constantly be pushed further sparks a rebellious thought in me and I wish-

“I will smother you with my pillow Logan” Roman interjects “Go to sleep, you'll be back to your normal, cold, and uncaring self in the morning” Logan rolls over, clutching to the pillow beside him “Nothing will matter and you'll have become familiar with at least three new people by noon” Roman decides

“Mm...I very much hope you are correct in your predicament” And with his final words Logan falls into a deep sleep. Roman after much cleaning, passes out in his own manner, sprawled on his bed, hating the night and the way it went.


	2. To Build it Up and Break It Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton finds himself allowing a slight detour in his plan and allows himself one night to...explore. He wont be doing that again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: IMMMM BACCCCK!! Look i know this chapter is stupid! and it sucks! But its finished and like actually here! Also!! the whole thing about Logan having no feelings and hating them is not what it reads as and im not trying to fall into that cliche!! But youll have to keep reading!!
> 
> TW: Swearing, alcohol, underage drinking, drinking, parties, kissing, throw up, slight self harm, emotional abuse

“He kissed me!” Virgil cries, Patton kicks him softly from under the table. “He kissed me” He whispers once more, shushing his words. Apologetic glances to the people around him and Patton looks back to his friend.

“We are in the library” Patton eyes, Virgil shrugs but nods returning to his doodles he calls work. Patton finishes his work, packing up neatly each and every aspect of his belonging. Panic sets into once he realizes Pattons finished his work and is now preparing for leisurely reading whilst Virgil hadn't even begun. “Virge, I love you but if you don't hurry up or make a plan I'm leaving”

“You're going to leave anyway, you have cheer” Virgil mutters, rushing through his work. Patton sighs, he squeezes his friends hand before quickly leaving him alone. Once settled on the bus his pockets buzz gently.

“Patton!” He greets, he ruffles through some of his things as he gets off the vehicle, thanking the driver kindly. He walks into the school he had become ever so familiar with after all these years. He watched as the sports team made their way out to practice on the field and found his path into the locker rooms as he listened to yet another telemarketing call. He hated them sure, but he felt guilty hanging up. Especially when it was just spoken by a real human, so he listens, nodding along until they go through the niceties and say goodbye with awkward persistence. Finally changed and in his navy blue uniform, he approaches the field. Instantly he's greeted by his friends, giddy jumps as they babble on about whatever they can muster. 

He allows the team to get set up, run out their talk before calling attention forward. He ignores the rampant football team that plays behind them. Though they reserved the field Patton allowed them to use it for practice.

“Alright squad! Listen up!” He claps, a cheery grin and catching his pom poms from his friend Fiona, it begins

~~~

“I simply do not understand” Logan huffs, simply bundling himself tighter into his jacket. He follows a sweaty Roman out of the boys room, as he waves goodbye to his fellow teammates they make their way home. “Why must I have attended this practice?” Logan inquires

“Because you need to get out of the house, fresh air, you can't be huddled all day drinking away until your dad gets here” Roman explains, they stop at his locker on the way back through the school, the sounds of giggling call his attention but both continue with themselves. 

“My father returning is truly not the optimal circumstance” He sighs but shrugs, puling out a small bottle from his pocket he takes a swig before a disappointed Roman snatches it away from him. They swivel and resume their trail before a quick crash decides to tumble things down. “Ah apologies” Logan decides before even looking, but his eyes dart and land his eyes on the top of a bouncy and bountiful head of hair, a sweet blushed bow and when the boy looks up he meets his eyes through his round rimmed glasses.

“You going to help?” Roman whispers, nudging his friend adamantly. Logan furrows his brows. “Obviously not” Logan continues staring, they stand frozen while Patton reestablishes himself. “Sorry Pat” The cheerleader finds Romans eyes, “-On...Patton” An awkward moment before someone taps behind Patton.

“Right well, I have to go” Patton shuffles awkwardly, his deep blue uniform fitting him comfortably. Why Logan was eyeing him was a different topic. He begins to walk away but Logan decides he’s not finished, taking his arm with a quick snap as Patton pulls away “Yes?” Logan continues his scan, a smirk.

“Go out with me”

“Cute!” Patton giggles before his somber tone returns “Bye now” he rolls his eyes, Roman can’t help but snicker, clutching to the lockers as he regains his breath. Logan scowls as he watches the man walk away, he decides to abandon his friend and follow Patton.

“Why not?” He questions, skidding in front of him. Patton, though taken aback, nods. “Give me a good reason as to why you wont entertain my company for a night?” Logan pushes. Patton adjusts his glasses, putting away his folders he clears his throat.

“You want one? Ill give you about a million” Patton smiles “First off, even if i was interested I have about a million things to do. I never have a moment off and I'm not so sure I want to spend my only freetime with you” Patton admits, why did that hurt Logan.

“Awe, that hurt” Logan hides

“Moreno im not stupid, I’ve seen how you work around here” Patton scoffs, he checks his phone, quickly replying to many messages. “You're charming! And honestly...kinda cute” Patton smirks, his small freckles dance upon his cheeks. “But i'm not a one night stand kind of guy” He shrugs

“Well, what if that's not what I want to do” Logan proposes, he pulls out his notepad scribbling done something before tearing a carefully neat crease and handing it to Patton. “You'll never know, if you don't give it a chance”

“I don't have time to give it a chance” Patton refuses the paper and decides the conversation has concluded. Logan flicks the note anyway, watching it land perfectly into his bag pocket. This satisfies him, now...to Roman.

~~~

“He asked you out?” Virgil inquires walking alongside Patton to their lockers.

“Eleven times” Patton sighs reaching his locker, he opens it up groaning at the sound of his phone. “Make that twelve” He looks to delete the message but quickly giggles. Virgil looks over his shoulder, quickly looking back as he meets Romans eyes and decides against it. “I have dance today” Patton notes, scribbling neatly in his planner, Virgil nods, squeezing his shoulder for luck as he walks away. “Tap shoes, tap shoes, tap shoes” He mutters searching through his bad waltzing into the auditorium.

“Morning Pat!” He looks up smiling as he greets the students. Walking backstage he fits his shoes on, tying his jacket around his waist.

“Alright students!” The teacher calls over the sound of the children warming up, Patton being the TA goes around checking on everyone and helping them out. He works with some students, holding them up as they work through his warm up. “Alright today's plan is partnering up and working through your partner dance!” Patton waits for everyone to partner up, going to the teacher. “Oh good, Patton, this is Logan Moreno, hes new but hes going to be your partner”

“What?” Patton turns, a smug Logan stands his hand extended and his feet ready. “Delightful” He sighs, he takes Logans hand and waits for the music. Once it begins he leads, and shockingly….Logan can dance. “Where’d you learn how to tap?”

“My mother wanted me to have a plethora of skills, so dance” He replies, spinning Patton in a quick circle. They dance around the room, Patton laughs as the routine moves, Logan feels a genuine rise in him as the smile flashes on the bright eyed boy's face. “Pretty…” He breathes

“What?” Patton wonders, they slow and close the gap between them. A slow dance as their taps echo carefully. “You're not bad” Patton compliments, Logans never heard it sound so genuine.

“Thank you, although you're quite advanced” Logan notes.

“I've been dancing since I was two years old” Patton epxlains, cheering the class while they take a break. “Ballet’s next” He notes, changing his shoes, Logan flicks his hands away helping him tie the bows. “Thank you” Logan helps him up.

“Go out with me” Logan inquires, Patton chuckles. He hadn't realized they had begun a slow waltz around the room. The space between them closes further, Patton doesn't quite mind the proximity. A quick spin before Logan pulls the boy back in. “If you say no, Ill stop”

“I doubt that” Pattons been here long enough, he heard the horror stories. “You're charming, I won't lie, but I'm not a shop and drop kinda person” Patton fiddles with Logans hand, they seperate landing on their own squares. He begins his pirouettes, focusing on a specific spot. Logan comes behind him, taking him by the waist as he dips perfectly.

“Give me a simple chance, Sorian” Logan begs “Im being serious about this, I don't typically pursue but...there's something I want to explore” Patton finds it sweet, his breath gasping on his neck definitely trying to persuade him.

But he wasn't someone's pawn, and he certainly wasn't trial run.

“I'm not going to be your test dummy” He pulls away, why did this spark excitement in Logan. A quick twirl before they finish their dance, a slow dip before they stand face to face. A smirk from Logan. “However, there is a carnival on friday, I plan to attend...should you be there...” Patton trails off, suggestive glance. Logan nods with quite an understanding, the bell rings and through Patton's rare impulsivity he places a gentle kiss on Logans cheek before he's onto his next class.

“Ill pick you up at eight” He calls, Patton rolls his eyes.

Subtle

~~~

“Well well well, look at you all dressed up!” Virgil mocks from Patton's bed. His fingers tap violently on his console. Patton rolls his eyes playfully, brushing off his outfit. His flower printed shirt complimenting a simple pastel overalls. His legs, though exposed, were warmed by socks.

“Super cute” Patton claps “Ugh, remind me to thank Remus when he calls next” Patton requests, Virgil shoots a thumbs up focusing more on his game. He really went all out, he missed the more chaotic of the twins but alas a parents choice isn't always something he could understand.

“Virge what do you want for dinner?” Patton's dad knocks, leaning into the room. “I can whip up some mac and cheese” Virgil smiles delighted, nodding at the delicious prospect. “Peaches you look great” He moves his attention to his son, the boy giving him a thankful stare. “You be careful ok? Text me when you're on your way home” A nod confirms it and it's just the friends once more.

“Are you sure I can sleep over?” Virgil throws his console to the end of the bed, grunts as he loses. Patton laughs, turning to his friend.

“V, of course” Patton lays on the bed, his back sore from practice. “Never are you not welcome here ok?” his phone buzzes, drawing attention to his home screen. His smile sinks, his two fathers smile bright while he sits a giggling baby in the middle chewing on his dad's tie. Virgil continues playing and the quiet game noises bring Patton back.

_Logan: I have arrived at your place of residence_

Patton couldn't help but smirk, he really did come to pick him up.

_Patton: Ill be out in a moment_

_Logan: Wonderful, its cold so bring a coat_

_Patton: Thank you channel five, weather report_

“Alright gloom, I'm out, see you later” a peace sign as his farewell and Pattons out and ready.

~~~

“Where were you?” Logan blinks as he enters his apartment, setting his coat away. His father stands in the den, disappointed. When was he not? Seems like the man had finally reached home, no doubt his private jet was stalling on the roof ready to whisk him away just as soon as he lectured Logan.

“Madrid, it took longer than expected, but I picked up some spanish” Logan retorts, the amusings were not met well by his father. “At the school's carnival with a friend” He admits, a bored sigh. Everything was so straight forward with his father, nothing ever sparked Logan with excitement.

“I expect you to be home, ready to greet me and tell me of your school life when I return from a trip. Then promptly go to sleep. Not out with a…friend” He snipes. Logan groans slouching as walks, or at least attempts to walk by his father. Hes exhausted and truly wishes the elation of his night wouldn't be tarnished by his father's own wishes.

But of course when did Logan ever get to do things of free will or without the rest of the few seconds dictated and planned out

“Logan Moreno you will stop right there, you will not be going on any more outings, and tomorrow at seven am sharp you will be ready to meet with my sales team to discuss opportunities. A short lunch then you will meet with my associate planner, and from there you will spend as much time as he wants discussing what you will do once you graduate” He finishes, not a breath wasted, or energy. “Goodnight Logan” he disappears into the shadowy darkness of the house leaving a sickly feeling in his son.

Once the house settles and he hears his father locked away in his office for the night, Logan on an impulse grabs an almost empty bottle of the vodka and stuffs it into his jacket pocket before retiring to his room for a night of sickly drinking, binge watching tv until his boredom reaches a peak of exhaustion. His eyelids close and the world sinks into a void of vast expanse where his pain feels numb.

~~~

“It was actually sweet Virge” Patton swoons, stabbing at his salad for another delectable bite. Virgil gleams at his friend, the actual happiness is undeniable. “I know its stupid and I know im defintely falling into his trap but...i dont know” Patton sighs

“Maybe theres something there” Virgil proposes, watching his eyes gaze over to a confident Roman, flexing at a table a few miles away. “Maybe hes serious?”

“Guess we’ll find out” He shrugs, mid bite he stops feeling his phone buzz. He checks dropping his food quickly. “Crap! I forgot I had a council meeting” He rushes to pack his things, giving Virgil a little pat on the head much to his friends' amusement. “See you!”

Maybe Logan was messing with his mind, he couldnt remember where the meeting was being held. God, he wishes he had written it down.

“You're the president Patton” he scolds himself racing through the metal halls lined with lockers. Science room or Astrology...he paces. He decides a fifty/fifty chance won't matter, he’ll just end up in an empty classroom or late for his own meeting. He chooses the astrology door, texting rapidly at his phone with severe apologies, the door creaks open but its not an empty room. “Oh! I'm so-” He begins finding he's interrupted a couple and a rather...steamy encounter. But his embarrassment quickly fades and turns to anger.

“Mind closing the door?” Cynthia, Patton recognizes from the cheer team, requests. Her arms and legs wrapped tightly around Logan. He wipes at his lips turning to face Patton. The teen expects some kind of remorse, some kind of apologetic look but his eyes are glazed over. Bored with the world, devoid of emotion.

“Door...please” He basically recites. Patton takes a quick breath, a smile creeps upon his face.

“Of course, pardon the interruption” He apologizes. He may have slammed the door harder than necessary but his fuming was visible. “I will not cry, im ok” He promises, clutching deeply at his palms, feeling his nails pierce the skin.

“Patton! There you are sunshine!” Greta laughs popping her head out of the science room. “Come on! Meetings chaos without you” She beams, motioning him in.

“Coming” He mumbles weakly, one more breath and his smile returns to his face. Plastered. He puts Logan out of his mind, and begins his speech. Completely unaware of the screaming that engulfed Logan's brain. Seeing Patton shouldn't have hit him so deep, but a punch to his gut and a sickly feeling.

_What was this?_

As the teen walked away feeling shameful for what the planets had seen, he catches a quick glimpse of the cheerleader leading the meeting through the door.

_Feelings?_

_Disgusting…_

A genuine smile flashes across Pattons face

_Do it again..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave me some comments!! i really love them!!


	3. Its All Coming Back To Me Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> return 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/n: New, bad, sorry. Comment? Sorry for short, important.
> 
> tw: Swearing, alcohol, underage drinking, drinking, parties, kissing, throw up, slight self harm, emotional abuse

“Ugh of course he did” Virgil sighs, throwing his journal across the room. Patton giggles still scribbling away at his homework. Virgil sits up, rubbing the nape of his neck with sympathy in his eyes. “Im sorry Pat, i know you wanted...not that”

“Hey its ok! I gave it a shot, plus the night I had was fun” Patton admits, he shrugs away his thoughts but finds himself doodling in the corner of his calculus work. “This is pointless” He shut his book away, returning it neatly to its spot on his desk. “My brain cant focus” He threw his eraser towards Virgil “Tell me about Roman” He smirks.

“Ok look nothings happened since the party” Virgil tells, and Patton listens, well until Virgil begins to ramble about their theatre project. His mind was in too many places at once, and he loved Virgil but once his gushing ended and his worries set in, Patton couldn't focus. His mind wandered to that fateful night, under the amber lights of a bustling evening.

_“But they're so sticky” Logan scrunched his face, watching Patton thank the shop tender for his caramel apple. Patton rolls his eyes with a playful smile._

_“Delicious is the word you're looking for” He corrects, Logan still doubtful. “Come on, take a bite” he offers, holding it up. Hesitant at first, Logan eyes it, was he examining the apple? Oh god, the way his glasses sat on his nose practically falling, Patton swears he could hear his heartbeat._

_“Alright” He says, he holds his glasses, Patton strengthens his hold as Logan takes a bite out of the delectable treat. Logan's eyes quickly fly open, a surprise as he chews._

_“Congrats Moreno! You're one of us common folk now” Patton teases, the wind ruffling both of their hair. Logan nods, taking yet another bite, Patotn didn't mind, he found the small chipmunk like chewing adorable. “Come on Simon, there's more to show you” He jokes, Logan takes his hand allowing the cheerleader to guide him. The apple was gone quickly but neither minded, it made their commute easier._

_Patton had to wonder if Logan had ever been outside however, every little new thing sparked him, the bored robotic look in his eyes disappeared with a new flicker of excitement. Patton adored it. He grew fond of how Logan would fiddle with his fingers, it was soft._

_“Just ignore them” Logan whispered as the pair walked towards a more quiet spot._

_“Hm?” Patton hummed in response, a small skip as the gravel crackled below their feet._

_“The girls and guys staring, just ignore them” And Patton had been. It was hard not to notice, each with daggers in their eyes but even if tonight was just a one time thing, or whatnot Patton was here to enjoy himself, enjoy the carnival he had spent weeks preparing and try something new. And it was nice, even if he did notice the winks Logan would throw out, the boredom as Patton chatted with people and the constant phone checking._

_Its nice_

_It was nice_

“So now im like i don't know! Should I dye my hair!” Virgil finishes, Patton coughs away his thoughts.

“I might have adhd but you can really go down a rabbit hole” Patton laughs, Virgil chuckles a flash of red on his cheeks. “Not a bad thing, and i think you should dye your hair if you want. No matter what you're gonna look great” Patton compliments. “Crap! We’re gonna be late” He checks his watch, morning homework sessions on monday were a usual. Except when they forget to actually get to school.

“Id say race you there but i dont wanna get there any faster than I have to” Virgil says, and with that they rush out the house.

~~~

“Does he have to looking so fucking cute” Logan spits, Roman stops his words instaly and looks to where an angry Logan glares.

“Uh Im sorry, imma need my friend back” Roman pokes, Logan turns to him, his eyebrows tightened. “Dude, what is going on with you” Roman questions, Logan slams the locker shut trying to distract himself from Patton and Virgil standing just a few steps down the hall at their own lockers. “Just a reminder that you-”

“Roman I am fully aware of what happened, I am also fully aware that the only reason Patton has not spoken to me is my own fault” Logan leans against the locker paralleling Romans pose. “However I am still infuriated that he looks that cute” Logan sighs. He wasn't wrong, even if Roman and Patton had their...issues he still knew his former friend. And Patton had an incredible eye for fashion.

And today was no exception. He wore a dropped shoulder cropped pullover, striped with white, pastel blue and pink, finished with a white collar. His light blue jeans sat comfortably on his legs cuffed at the bottom to show off his white sneakers. His belt was prominent and no mistake and his backpack slung over just one shoulder as he unpacked his belongings into his locker.

Objectively he was cute, but Roman was distracted by Virgil. He stood next to Patton talking away, his outfits always suited him and his defensive look only made Romans face flush more.

“Welp, you win some you lose some” Roman shrugs, patting his friend.

“I so appreciate the sentiment dear friend” Logan's sarcasm was not lost on Roman.

“Come on, you need some sushi in you” Roman takes his friend's shoulders, preparing to guide his friend towards the exit. Each has a free period that bleeds into lunch so why not take advantage?

~~~

“Is it bad that I want to wear Romans varsity jacket?” Virgil whispered as he darted his eyes away from the said jock who only stood a few feet away.

“No, it's adorable” Patton says, he organizes his things in his locker, ignoring as Logan and Roman begin to walk towards them. He knew rationally they were headed towards the exit but the small inkling of fear if they were to come up to him was still present. But quickly his mind was taken elsewhere with an abrupt cheer.

“One! Two! Three!” He hears, why was that voice so familiar? “Who missed me!”

“Janus!” Patton recognizes, he spins with unfiltered excitement rushing through the hall. Janus laughs as he sees his friend racing towards him wasting no time to wrap him in his arms and spin him quickly. Their embrace was pure elation, Virgil caught up to the pair with his own grin. They finally parted ignoring the crowd around them, specifically two boys who had decided sushi could wait.

“Buttercup!” He grins, Patton giggles delighted. He had missed Janus so much, and the sweet way the nickname fell only increased the buzz in his heart.

Someone else in the hall was not feeling the ecstatic energy. Logan glared his shoulders tightening under Romans hold. What was this envious sweat dripping from him as he watched Janus snake a respectful arm around Patton's waist, cupped to keep his gentlemans distance.

But Logan wasn't allowed to be mad

He saw Carly down the hall, she winked at him receiving a disgruntled scowl in return. He watched Brittany and Martin walk by him, each a flustered look.

And why should he care, he had the whole school, why did he need-

His thoughts were interrupted by the most intoxicating, sweetest sound to ever bless his ears. Pattons little giggle as he clutched to Janus for stability. He may have been seventeen but he towered over the boys, including Logan. Virgil seemed happy enough but Logan couldn't get over Patton. Patton stood blushing, his hand never left Janus’s side and he was...flashing the brightest smile.

Why did Logan want to be the one to cause that reaction

“Oh shut up moreno” He whispers to himself, swiping away from Romans grasps he shoots Martin a wink before making his way to lunch, a hesitant Roman followed.

**Author's Note:**

> aahahhaa THIS SUCKS AND I HATE IT BUT I GUESS ENJOY


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